Shameless cheater of India 2009 - Award Nominations

Who says Indian eCommerce is yet to kickoff? I say it's already kicking asses, however on receiving end is the Indian consumer! To help Indian consumer come of reluctant mode and start spending freely, shopping sites of India are offering huge discounts, gifts, offers and cash-backs. Up to 50% cash-back across range of products. But... all the cash backs are virtual. The schemes are tailored in a way that either you get zero discount or you end up spending almost six times of the cash back value.

I am a regular at IndiaPlaza.in. I like the site for price research. The items sold on their sites are all grey-market ones but the prices are in sync with street prices of 100% genuine products with bill-warranty. While looking for a washing machine on the site, I came across a banner that shouted '20% cash-back on all items except air-tickets.' I have always been highly wary of IndiaPlaza's offers but this banner amused me and I clicked it to read terms and conditions. There were a hell lot of conditions but the most primary one is "The cash-back will be given in form of gift-certificates. The Cash back gift certicates will be in the following denominations: Rs.100/-, Rs.200/-, Rs.300/-, Rs. 500/-. Example: The 400/- GC may come to you as two Rs.200/- GCs or One Rs.200/- GC and 2 Rs.100/- GCs."

Sounds good so far? But here is the catch. I I buy a washing machine worth 20,000 rupees and get a cash-back worth 4,000 rupees, they will send me a whole bunch of gift certificates ranging in 100-500 rupees (I am sure Rs.100 gift certificates will dominate). Now, as a policy, you cannot use two gift certificates to buy one item on IndiaPlaza (it's not written in the terms and conditions but I know this). It means you are left with numerous gift certificates of 100-200 rupees which you either cannot use at all or if you use, you will end up paying much more. What a creative sales-strategy!

But wait, yesterday I happened to visit IndiaTimes and to my horror, it too have the similar offer going on. Two changes, though: 1. You get 50% cash back!!! and 2. In terms and conditions it's mentioned that gift certificates are nonmergable and must be redeemed before 31st March.

So, we have two nominations for 'Shameless Cheater of India 2009' award. And both are too close.

Back to square one!

Had started blogging with Blogger a couple of years ago. Moved on to use WordPress, hosted my blog on my own site and now I am back to Blogger all over again!

I like WordPress but I am sort of forced to use Blogger all over again. My previous web setup was a complete mess. I had hosted my website www.banwarilalsharma.com with a Chennai-based web-hosting company called Silicon House. It was a budget-hosting, I understand. I accepted the fact that it was a bit slow and the servers were down more frequently than they should. Everything was going good until one fine day when I tried to open my site and came back an empty page saying 'Cannot Find Server'. I thought the server is done. Tried the next day, next week, next month (yes, I am this lazy!). The same result everytime. I got curious and tried logging in to the control panel. I was shocked to know that I have no hosting. It looked like that the bunch of fools had erased the server hard-drive or something. My MySQL database was gone, all the static pages were gone. It took me a couple of months of email discussions with them to know that nothing can be done. My blog is gone!

Thanks to Blogger, I had around 35 posts saved in the control panel (before switching to WordPress). I could recover rest of the posts through archive.org (thanks to you as well). I am back to Blogger once again, until I find a better solution provider and some time to experiment again. :-)

A Fine Balance by Rohinton Mistry

This time I broke all my previous records. I took over six months to finish Rohinton Mistry’s A Fine Balance. I would blame my busyness (this isn’t a word) for this. The only time I could give to reading was when I was traveling. It took me two journeys to my native place to finish the novel. I may blame bad air/rail/road connectivity for so many things but for reading, it was a boon. The over twenty-hour (one way) journey gave me a chance to read this masterpiece.

As far as busyness is concerned, it’s obvious. Career is moving fast and it’s taking its toll in terms of my time. I leave office building every evening but I am unable to leave ‘office’. It has come to my bedroom now and has left me with no choice to do anything else. Maybe this is what happens with everyone, right? So, no complaints here. Anyways, this is supposed to be A Fine Balance’s review, right? Let’s start. :)

The novel is all about lives of four characters i.e. Dina Dalal, a widow in mid-fifties, Maneck Kohlah, a young, under-graduate student, Ishwar Darji, a cobbler-turned-tailor, never-married, mid-fifties man and Omprakash Darji (or Om), a tailor and Ishwar’s nephew. Dina Dalal has been living in Bombay since her birth. Maneck comes to Bombay for higher studies. Ishwar and Om made Bombay a home in hope of good jobs and better livings. If I say anything more than this about the characters, I would end up revealing something that you would regret to know before reading the novel. Despite being entirely different from one another, they come close in very bizarre circumstances.

I find A Fine Balance as very close to Premchand’s Godan in terms of brutality of one’s fate, the society and the system. Just like Godan, in this novel, there seems to be no end to the problems of the common man. To me, A Fine Balance looks like a revisit to the world depicted in Godan by the great Premchand. Godan is a pre-independence novel and mainly shows the problems associated with the lives of villagers. Rohinton’s A Fine Balance too moves around the same problems but it extends further and shows the condition of common man in the more brutal Bombay. The novel proves that nothing has changed in the last 100 years. The country, the people and the problems, all are the same.

The novel covers a vast set of problems that persisted in India in 1970’s. The novel makes us go to the roots of well-known (and still persisting) problems like caste system, unemployment, poverty and corruption to specific problems of 70s like problems emerged because of Emergency called by Indira Gandhi. There are several examples in the novel that tell us how systems are made for betterment of things but end up ruining them. One such example set in novel is, the Gandhi government encouraged family planning for controlling the emerging population. But this didn’t do any good to the most, rather it ruined lives of many. Mostly young, unmarried or elderly people were forced to go for the nasbandi program.

Despite of the lengthy descriptions of the characters and events, Rohinton Mistry was able to keep me involved. Curiosity was always on extreme. Due to less but prominent characters, I was able to recall them without any confusion, even after an interval of three months. The only thing I regretted reading this novel was the kind of stress it gave me. Every event mentioned in the novel made me go deep into the situation, maybe because I have seen quite similar events in my own life or in lives of people around. Another positive point about this novel was its connection with Parsi culture (apart from Maneck Kohlah and Dina Dalal, there are several Parsi characters in the novel). Being a Parsi, Rohinton Mistry was able to beautifully describe the Parsi culture.

I give full marks to this highly tragic novel. A must read if you can bear all the stress it will give to you.

Mumbai Under Construction!

I came to Bombay around 2 years ago. The day I landed in Vashi, I saw road construction in progress. Today, after two years, nothing has changed. Road construction is still in progress. I am not talking entire Vashi, I am talking about a small stretch of 5 kms that I need to commute on weekends. NMMC (Navi Mumbai Municipal Corporation) or whoever is responsible for the construction is taking its own sweet time to finish the work.

What a non-sense system we have. One constructs and the other destructs. Cycle of constructions and destructions seems to be never-ending.

There are a lots of chaos because of this. Long, unnecessary traffic-jams, honking vehicles, frustrated people. Sometimes you feel like dying. Air-conditioned, music-filled environment inside of the car just doesn’t sooth you.

You cannot guarantee a time for reaching somewhere, no matter howsoever short distance you are considering. Past night, when I left for office, everything was usual but while coming back from office, I took 15 minutes. I would have traveled this distance in less than five minutes if I was on foot.

It is not the case with Vashi only. You name a place in Bombay where there is no road construction work going on. Forget place, you can’t even suggest a 2 kms stretch. It seems entire Bombay is under construction! When will I see a developed Bombay? As of now, there doesn’t seem to be an end to the problem.

My sweet Bhopal and its sweeter Bhopali language

A few days ago, Mohit sir asked me to search 'Bhopali Bakar' in wikipedia. Though I am very much comfortable with the meaning of the term, I was wondering what will it come up with. Searched and found a page with Bhopali Bakar title. Went through it and found myself laughing like anything. I had been in Bhopal for around seven years and I enjoyed this special Bhopali-style language a lot then. This page just reminded me old sweet days. Thought of sharing the same...

Is it Modernization or Westernization?

I and Rajeev were standing on a tea-stall behind our office. It's almost a routine for me and Rajeev to visit the tea-stall at least twice-thrice a day, no matter how many teas we have in office in a day. ;-)

There is a private college with some Tilak... name. I am not sure about the courses offered by the college, but I saw MBA/MCA written below college's name on a wall nearby. Every-time I go there and see the students, I find myself thinking unnecessarily. There is always a debate going on in my mind. Topic? Westernization vs Modernization! Every student has got something different as far as looks and outfits are concerned. Take example of their pants, they wear pants those are so bizarre in looks, it seems they haven't washed them for months. They are so low at waist, it seems they can fall anytime. Underwear are apparently visible and if they bow in front direction by 30-40 degrees, you can consider yourself one of the people who got a chance to see private parts of this gentleman/lady!

One young gentleman was shouting abuses at someone on phone. His opposite-sex batch-mates were standing very close to him and were giggling all the way. This guy was center of attraction for everybody passing by. I would rate those abuses below C-grade, only a sadak-chhap drunk moron can abuse this way. We Indians use incestuous abuses and we (men) can digest them but the abuses seemed alien to me, felt like approaching the guy and slap very hard. The only thing I could think was, 'These are under-graduate students. Future of India! What happened to their manners?'

Suddenly, many questions seemed to blow up my mind! Is abusing aloud a sign of being contemporary? Wearing highly obscene/vulgar clothes a symbol of being modern? Are they modern? Or are they going Western? Or are words Modern and Western synonyms? One part of my mind says, Banwari, beta, you are too much traditional to digest this. You have come from a very small place and these young fellows have been living in the fastest Indian city for their entire life, and this makes a difference. But another part of my mind is not able to accept it and keeps me bugging, always. It says, 'Mumbai is going towards Westernization, not Modernization!' :-)

Chiken Munia: An epidemic or fantasy?

I visited my home-town (Ambah, Morena district, M.P. India) during Diwali festival and found something strange there. The instant I entered my home I came to know that almost every member of my family has pain in their hands, legs/feet. They had fever too just a few days back which vanished over time. My mother, who was on bed told me that we are not the only victims of this strange disease but entire district is struggling. My father added that not only Morena but people in almost 500kms range are suffering. He concluded that its Chiken Munia, an EPIDEMIC!

Chiken Munia starts with very high temperature and ends up leaving pain and swelling in hands/legs which seems never-lasting. There was no medicine available in the market for the disease, doctors were recommending people to have good rest and patience. They said, it will go on its own. However, no one could believe them and people were taking pain-killers, injections in order to reduce the pain. I saw my mother's right hand which she could barely use for any work in last couple of weeks. She took injections on alternate days but in vain. Visited a few friends/neighbors and realized that almost every Ambahite is suffering or at least have suffered! In nutshell, none at Ambah seemed 100% fit, doesn't matter how good or bad at finance s/he was. When I went to Bhopal (which is 450 kms far from Ambah), Auntie told me that she too had suffered from Chiken Munia and still have some pain in hands.

I was wondering what Indian government, doctors did in this regard. There was no medical camp held, no special medicines provided, no precautions aired, virtually nothing happened. It seemed that there is no disease/epidemic named Chiken Munia. My brother took me back to reality, reality of Indian government, Indian politics. He told that there was some statement in newspapers/TV by some health minister that "Chiken Munia is no epidemic. Its merely a fantasy which is originated in idle minds in order to create some buzz around." I couldn't stop myself from smiling at my brother's declaration and thought, 'Wah minister sahib, how true you are!'

Was this the right attitude?

While coming to office today we visited Varenyam Motors as Rajeev had to do correct some bug in their software. When he went inside the showroom, I and Satish were standing outside, beside the road. It was hardly two minutes, a woman (beggar) came to us with her daughter and asked both of us for some money. I was the first who denied any sort of help, Satish did the same. She walked away...

After a little while a gentleman in his mid-fifties came to us. He addressed Satish first and asked for some help. He begged us for 5 rupees so that he can have some food. He said "5 rupaye kam pad rahe hain khane main. Please help kijiye. Aap log engineering ke students lagte ho." He wore a light-coloured shirt and dark pants, shirt was in. Overall he looked like a descent human being in need of some money.

5 rupees is not a thing to think twice, still I saw Satish and waited for a couple of seconds. He gave me a blank look, without any further delay, I pulled out my wallet and drew a 10-rupee-note and handed over to the gentleman. He thanked me and walked over.


Just before he left us, I smelled something! He was drunk! Okay, so he has just begged for 5 rupees to take another drink. He seemed a gentleman and I donated him 10 rupees while I didn't have a single rupee for that lady who wasn't wearing a good dress. I didn't give her a rupee because I knew, she will misuse my money! What the worse misuse could be other than drinking. She had a daughter and they really seemed in need while that rascal came to me in good dress and I gave him 10 rupees happily. I know there are lakhs of beggars in India and I am not a king who can donate every one of them but I didn't do the right thing to the woman in the morning.

Was this the right attitude? Should I have given that woman 1 rupee or shouldn't I have given that moron a 10-rupee-note? I am really confused and hurt.

Domination of Gita Press in Hindu spiritual literature

Fellow-EpicIndian Saravana Kumar suggested a website www.gitapress.org for Gita and other Hindu spiritual books. As the name of website suggests, its website of Gita Press Gorakhpur. The press publishes Gita, Ramayan, Mahabharat, Puran-Upnishads and other spiritual books for all age.

What attracted me most was the variety of books available on every subject. Another advantage is the extremely-low-prices. Gita of 14cmx21cm 430pages is priced at Rs.25 only. Strange! They are definitely not earning anything out of it.

Gita Press was founded in 1923 by Jayadayal Goyandka. The press has published over 37 crore books so far, isn't it a huge figure? They say that their selling price is lower than the production price. They don't seek any kind of donations for their survival. They have many outlets all over the India. Alas! There is none in Bhopal :( Anyways, Internet Jindabad!!! :-)

Do Raaste...

Last week I was watching Do Raaste on TV and was wondering how real the old films were. Very simple but realistic story, class acting and direction. They depicted contemporary problems very well. This was entertaining and learning, indeed. Considering the old films sometimes I wonder, how far new films are from reality.

Three brothers live with peace in a single home with their mother. The eldest brother Navendru (Balraj Sahni) is married and his wife Madhvi (Kamini Kaushal) considers the home her own home, her brothers-in-law Birju (Prem Chopra) and Satyam (Rajesh Khanna) her own brothers and her mother-in-law (Veena) her own mother. Story takes a sharp turn when Birju falls in love with Neela (Bindu). They get married and Neela starts to live with them. She was from somewhat high-class family thus finds it hard to adjust with the new family. Navendru and Madhvi try to settle down matters but in vain. Disputes turn into quarrels and finally Birju and Neela left the home and start to live separately. Goodwills of Satyam, Navendru and Madhvi make the couple awake and fetch them to live with the family at last.

This seems to be the story of every middle-class joint family, doesn't it? However the difference is that in real world stories ain't fairy tales. Once a family breaks, it never joins again, never!

I forgot to mention Reena (Mumtaz) here. She is Satyam's lover and Neela's younger sister. Both the sisters' nature is quite contradictory. Both are from same family, grown up with same comforts but still are different.

Reena is of type which is rare today. We find lots of Neelas around. If we look closely, there is one Neela in every other family. However it wasn't Neela exactly who broke the family, instead it was Birju who didn't give a damn to his family. He kept on doing things Neela demanded for. Neela could do all this just because of his husband. So, I should rewrite my phrase, We have one or maybe more Birjus in every other family around.

How good it must be to live in a joint-family. You share your happiness, sorrow. There is lots of support for everything. Why this generation wants to live alone, separate from their parents, siblings? Why new brides want to be Neela not Reena? Why brothers start to act like Birju as soon as they get married? Is it that hard to become Navendru or Satyam?